05 October 2005

feeling like a single parent and lack of peaing

This is totally weirdness. Jaxon is threatening that "I'm siiiick!". I don't know if this a reaction to daddy being gone (which, by the way, he seems completely fine with so far...it's that 3 year old he-doesn't-really-truly-get-it thing) or if he actually IS getting sick. I hate to say that I hope it's the daddy being gone thing rather than the sick thing, but at this point I do just to get me through the rest of my work week and to the weekend! A co-worker is taking another mini vacation tomorrow and Friday...so here we go again with doing two jobs for two days...and really...it's just not feasible at all for me to do two jobs from home. A half-assed attempt at my one...maybe. Two? No way. So in other words, I really need Jaxon to not be sick...not right now. And then we need to think up a Plan B for when this happens in the future. Sometimes I hate being indispensable at work. Really. Can I please just go work at Starbucks and be able to call in sick when my kid is sick?

Oh yeah. And I miss my husband.

Good news? The house will be cleaner. Really...I realize he's somewhat of a slob. He just doesn't do the whole put it away when you're finished thing. Even garbage...it's too weird. Last week he brought me home his leftover popcorn from the movies (this is our thing...I LOVE it when he does this...such a yummy treat). I finished it and asked him to put the empty bag in the garbage for me. I headed off to bed. The next morning what do I see on the counter? The crumpled bag. Um...hello? You walked into the kitchen and couldn't be bothered to open the cupboard and put the damn bag in the garbage? Maybe if I keep thinking of stuff like this I won't miss him so much...KIDDING!!! Love him to bits and a messy house is worth it. I miss him.

I miss checking the pea pod. A LOT. I don't think I've been over to leave praise since...well...maybe a week and a half. I MUST make time for this. Busy, as usual...but I don't feel good about using that excuse forever. I miss seeing all the inspirational work and all my favourite pea-ers latest. OK. Hopefully later today. Amongst the ten gazillion other things on The List, making dinner, making lunches for tomorrow, bathing my kid, putting laundry away, tidying up, doing dishes...ya...amongst all that...must find time to pea.

Over and out. It's HUMP DAY!!!!

04 October 2005

he's going away

D's job is taking him away from us. Not sure for how long. This is all very new to us...being separated at all. It's happened maybe twice for a week at a time in 6 years. He will still be fairly close...we can go see him maybe on the weekends. What a strange, strange adjustment. Me...I'm so busy that life will just have to carry on. But I'll miss him so much...just those moments of knowing he's there with me. The hugs, the kisses, the nice kind things he's always saying and doing...his love, his support. It will all still be there, but I'm pretty much going to be a single mama...at least during the week. And D. He seems kinda screwed up about it. He has NEVER been separated from Jaxon for more than like 3 nights tops. He's feeling weird. I initially was selfish...thinking of the changes to my own life and Jaxon's life and our daily routine. But he needed to hear something else from me...and I realized that thank god.
me: you don't need to worry about us...nothing is going to happen to us just because you're away.
d: it makes me feel so good to hear you say that.

It's a new challenge, but we'll be fine. I'm sure.